You ever get the feeling someone is judging you and they don’t know you enough to judge you, in the first place? Have you ever been hurt by another’s casual and unplanned attack on your personal character? Don’t get me wrong, I am a sinner, and I have a lot of becoming more like Christ to do. I will be the first to admit, I have a tremendous amount of spiritual growing up to do. I will also be the first to admit, I love God and desire with all my being to please Him. I will also admit, I don’t enjoy being confronted. However, I have a heart that desperately longs to grow in my faith and to recognize and fix any characteristics that hinder my walk with The Lord.
Let me say, I am shocked by a few people in our midst, our churches, our families, and in our lives whom feel it is their place to inform others of their character flaws. I am going to school to be a Christian counselor. I would like to pass along a vital nugget of wisdom I’ve acquired through my studies. (Not just through my studies, but through God’s word.)
Are you ready?
There will be a time when we are called by God to confront sin in other believers! These are necessary points to ponder before we confront anyone of their sin or personal character flaws.
1). We should NEVER confront sin in another person, unless we have CLEARLY heard, The Lord informing us to confront. More often than not, it is people just being plain petty, judgmental, and attempting to micromanage the world. God himself doesn’t micromanage his creation, therefore, why do His followers feel it is their place to micromanage their friends and family members.
2). We must NEVER cause harm to another person. As a counselor in training I take a pledge, “To NEVER” cause harm to my clients. Confronting someone, before God has prepared their hearts to receive the confrontation. may cause irreparable damage to that persons spiritual walk, self-esteem, and frankly their relationship with you.
3). The relationship between confronter/receiver, MUST be strong enough to withhold the confrontation. Several examples would be the counselor/client, friend/friend, husband/wife, and pastor/parishioner relationships. In other words, the receiver has to come to a place, where they know you genuinely care about them and deep trust is built into the relationship, prior to the confrontation.
This next one is EXTREMELY important… Put on your attention caps!
4). Anytime we feel lead to confront anyone, we MUST do so in humility. God NEVER calls someone to confront without a personal heavy dose of humility on the confronter’s part. Let’s face it, we are all sinners, we’re all in desperate need for a Savior, and NONE of us is better than another.
5). We MUST… MUST…MUST… MUST only confront in love. Confronting another is a serious matter and confrontations are never taken lightly. The receiver MUST know the confronter genuinely cares for their well-being and loves them unconditionally.
“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.”
“Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”
1 Corinthians 13:1-13
“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;”
Friends, I pray you be blessed today! And remember, we are all sinners, and we NEED to practice forgiveness. People will hurt us and it is essential we extend the God’s grace, to others in our midst!