The Flame Within

If your like me, you like to know that you have control over circumstances, people, and events that happen in your life.  If there is one thing I have learned in this life, it is that I have “very little” control!  The past few weeks have proven this true.  Things continue happening all around me, leaving me feeling helpless!  

My grandmother fell and had 8 staples in her head.  My grandmother’s body is aging, growing feeble, and the realization that her time on Earth is nearing it’s end, is heartbreaking.  I can’t make her body better!  I can’t keep her from falling!  I can’t make her memory not forget!  I have no control!  

I can’t make my child’s speech teacher, who has helped my son tremendously, remain at her job!  She has proven over the past year to be an invaluable resource in helping my child.  Once again, I have no control!  

I can’t force my professor to do his job correctly, thus causing extra hardship and stress on my life!  It’s out of my control!  

As I sit here struggling with things I have no control over, I ponder, “What can I control?”  Pondering the areas where I have some control, doesn’t make me feel much better.  

I could eat well, workout, and give my all to losing weight, but “ultimately” I can’t control the scale.  I can call my grandma everyday, I can drive the 5 hours home to check on her, but I can’t control her health conditions.  

I can look for a different therapist for my son, I can walk him through the disappointment of saying goodbye to someone he’s grown to care about, and I can find him another therapist, but I can’t control his inevitable sadness.

I can complain to the university about the lack of determination on my professor’s part to do his job, but I can’t make him do his job properly. 

This is down-right depressing, I know what your thinking!  I am thinking the same thing…

As I sit here, I begin thinking, well than, “{What can I do?}… 

Friends, It all comes down to one word….  {TRUST}.  

It’s all I’ve got…  My {faith}!  

I can trust in God!  I can pray!  I can ask God for guidance!  I can ask Him to protect my grandmother.  I can pray for his guidance, for his comfort, and for his peace!  

Philippians 4:4-7 states, “Rejoice in the Lord always.  I will say it again: Rejoice!  Let your gentleness be evident to all.  The Lord is near.  Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Wow, It’s as if God is speaking this directly to me.  Actually, He is!  He is speaking these words to each and everyone of us!  He knew this life would prove difficult!  He knew we were weak!  He knew our hearts would be broken!  He knew {WE NEEDED} Him!

Today, I am thankful for God’s word, speaking directly into my weary heart, just when I need Him the most!  He’s always there!  He is strong enough to {control} our load!  He never expected us to carry our loads alone.  

Today, I am handing my weary load over to Him.  I am placing my heart, marriage, my children, my grandmother, and my schooling in His hands!  I will seek Him for guidance and peace!  I will relinquish my human desire to {control}.  I will {TRUST}!

Blessings,

Crystal