How To Use Facebook, Without Allowing Facebook to Bring You Down

Lately, I’ve had several conversations with friends about Facebook.  Speaking openly and honestly with friends about Facebook’s pro’s and con’s, has encouraged me to write this blog.

Seven Things to Keep In Mind As You Utilize Facebook

1.  If Facebook makes you feel bad about yourself, you close your account.

The world is constantly hurling bombs at us.  Many of these bombs we can’t control.  We can control whether we have a Facebook account.  It’s as simple as a few clicks of the mouse.  Voila… no more Facebook bombs.  (I want to assure you understand I am not throwing stones, I just want my readers, my friends, and my family members to feel good about themselves.)  In the same way, I don’t desire my children to get hurt by the people around them, I don’t want to see you hurt either.

2. We can control who we friend, who we delete, and much of what comes through our News Feed.

A few months ago, I left my computer running on my Facebook page, and found my 10 year old scrolling through my news feed.  I’m not sure all that he saw, but I realized one thing….  I care more about my child’s future, what he sees, and the information he perceives, than I do about hurting a long lost friend on my Facebook friend list.  I posted on my page, “I must inform you that today I found my son scrolling through my news feed, and it suddenly hit me that I must cleanse my news feed.  If you are a person who regularly post’s improper pictures, or words than you will be removed from my friend list.  It’s nothing personal, I’m just an over-protective mother, protecting my little ones.”

3. We must decide… Why do I have a Facebook account?

As for myself, I find Facebook to be a great ministry opportunity.  I can post scriptures the Lord has placed on my heart, send encouraging messages to friends, and keep in touch with loved ones all over the world.  I have even seen God use His people for His good works through Facebook.  Are you using Facebook as a venue to whine or complain?  To be honest, I get quite annoyed with whiners on Facebook.  (I have been guilty of this in the past as well, and I even get annoyed with myself).  Especially as Christians, our sole purpose for everything we do should be to glorify God.  Before I post a comment, I ask myself these things.

* Is this post negative?

* Will this offend or hurt someone’s feelings?

* Am I complaining for the sake of complaining?

* Will this hinder my reputation as a believer?

* Does this post glorify God?

4.  We must realize, people “typically” post their grandest side, and not all their ugliness.

In my conversations with  friends, I have maintained one crucial theme…  “We are human, and we compare ourselves to those around us.”  Moms, although many of us look like the perfect mothers on Facebook, let me be the first to confess.  I am not a perfect mother.  I lose my temper on my kids, I snap at them when I should hold them, and daily I must confess my sin before God.  Not a single one of us is perfect.  Christ himself, was the only perfect human who ever walked this Earth’s soil.   I post perfect little pictures of my sweets, I blog about special moments I share with my kiddos, but I usually don’t share my biggest failures.  Our biggest failures…  we tend to keep to ourselves, we may share with our closest friends, but we don’t want the world knowing all our weaknesses.  When scrolling through Facebook, we should take the good as examples, and maybe gain some ideas from those around us.  If you are doing your best as a mom, if you are loving your little ones with all your heart, if you are seeking God’s will as your raise them (Deuteronomy 22:6 “Train up a child in the way they should go, and when they are old they shall never depart from it”)… than you are a good mom.

5. Susie Homemaker quilts, bakes, cooks, makes scrapbooks, has an immaculate house, maintains an amazing and popular blog, has a prestigious job, sews, sings to her kids, reads to her kids, etc….  Get the idea!  We need to realize “Susie Homemaker does not exist.”

We need to stop putting extreme pressure on ourselves.  Our children are enough pressure, and raising them is often more than we can handle.  I am most guilty in this area.  I want to do it all, I want to be like Anne who bakes wholesome bread, and I want to be like Crystal who gently sings to her children all the day, I want to be like Eve,  her home is spotless,   I want to sew like Gretchen, and I want to blog like Melanie, and I want to be fit like Brandi.  STOP!!!!!!!!!!!  God made you the way you are!  He loves you despite your burnt bread, he loves you despite the fast food you feed your kids, he loves you! I know it must break God’s heart, to look down and see us moms trying our hardest to be everything  He never intended for us to be, and not focusing on who He  intends for us to become.

6. We need to give a little grace.

We are all a work in progress.  (Ephesians 2:10′ “We are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works.  Which he has prepared in advance for us to do.” As we scroll through Facebook, we see all levels of God’s progress in our friends.  Some are new believer’s, some don’t know what they believe, some are seeking attention, some are whiners, some seem to only complain, some seem to have saintlike faith.  Despite where people are, we need to focus on ministering into their lives.  We are called to be the hands and feet of Jesus.  Is this our focus as we socialize with our Facebook friends?

7. Most importantly, we need to find our worth in God alone.

The reason Satan uses Facebook as a weapon to harm us, is because He knows we are people of insecurity.  Several years ago, after scrolling through Facebook, I felt terrible.  I’ll never forget the horrible thoughts I had playing in my mind.  I felt ugly, rotten, mean, unloved, unwanted, and I really thought to myself, the whole world hates me.  At that moment, I hated myself.  God spoke into my heart, as he desired to comfort my sobbing heart.  “Crystal, STOP, I love you!  Why are you seeking your self worth, your esteem through Facebook?  Really?  Do you trust me?  Do you not know of my affection for you?  You must not look to this world for your security, for your worth.  Look up I will show you how much you mean to me, I will show you your worth, I will love you!  Stop… Please stop, looking to the world for fulfillment.  Look to me, I desire to fulfill you.  I love you, my precious daughter!”  I remember writing in my blog, as I cried out my very own psalm to the God of Heaven and Earth.  Admitting my sin, and seeking His love, to fill my emptiness.

If you gather anything from this blog entry, it is my prayer you will know God loves you.  I pray you will know God’s love intimately, and you can use Facebook as tool to glorify God, and not allow Satan to use it as a tool to torment your spirit.

Friends…  Do you know how much God loves you?  He made you!  He sent His son to die on a cross for YOU!  Who cares if you don’t quilt, or cook delicious meals, or if you don’t look like a super model.   God doesn’t!

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6 thoughts on “How To Use Facebook, Without Allowing Facebook to Bring You Down

  1. Alecia, thank you for visiting my blog. Facebook and its implications on our lives has been preying on my mind, for quite sometime. It literally breaks my heart to see so many hearts breaking, over something as silly as Facebook. Blessings, Crystal

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